Tuesday’s ten things, because I’ve been away so long…

jack the dog

How can that face NOT make a person happy?

…and none of these deserve their own post.

  1. Separation of church and state – fine! – but most Americans celebrate Easter or Passover and they fall within the same time frame this year, April 14-22, so what the hell are all these school districts thinking scheduling spring break in March?  Goldie goes to Catholic school and so is off late next week and the week after.  Bun Bun and Miss T attend a secular, libertine, hedonistic institution that has turned their back on God and family, so were off the last two weeks.  I’m kidding – I LOVE THE SCHOOL THEY ATTEND – but the California Association of Independent Schools needs to rethink their spring break.  Many families have kids in different districts and so different vacation time.  In the grand scheme of things, this isn’t a problem, but neither is coordinating yearly schedules with local schools so that traffic is lighter everywhere, parents can plan a trip or childcare, and I can write.  I’m serious.
  2. You’ve now heard John Legend’s “All of Me”, right?  Can you imagine someone writing those words about you?  Click HERE to listen and read the lyrics.  I’m not taking you to the official music video of the song because then you might compare yourself to Legend’s wife, model Chrissy Teigen, and feel bad about your bathing-suit-not-ready self.  Legend’s voice is something that should only make you feel good.
  3. Frank Bruni wrote an Op-Ed piece for the New York Times on Monday, bemoaning the lack of common cultural experiences between our generation (he’s my age) and that of the Millennials.  Yet yesterday, when Goldie heard on the radio about Mickey Rooney and asked, “He died?” I responded, “Yeah, you know who he was?”  She said yes and then asked sadly, “How old was he?”  I told her Rooney was 93 and had a good run, to which she quickly offered, “Oh no, that’s not who I was thinking of.”  There was then discussion about Woody Harrelson, who is not dead, and Philip Seymour Hoffman, who is.  And then I was just confused.  RIP Mickey.
  4. Household issues that make me happy: an empty dishwasher, empty kitchen trash cans, toilet paper right there when the current roll runs out, vacuumed carpets, a kitchen island free of clutter.  Monday morning I woke up to all of those except the clutter thing.  It’s sad and curious how much happier I am when there is order in my house, which is almost never.  I actually agree with Phyllis Diller – “Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing” – but I can’t help myself.  I don’t like extra stuff and I wish everything were in its place.
  5. Miss T was talking about the dynamics at school during their morning break.  She’s in 5th grade, so some of the girls are starting to hang out with the boys, some of the girls are still hanging with each other talking about everyone else (because that’s what we do), and others are scattered, still running, bouncing, throwing, jumping.  Miss T likes to juggle a soccer ball on her break (I think she’s trying for a world record) and said to me, “I want to keep playing at recess, even in middle school.”  Why did any of us ever stop playing at recess?  I’ve just decided this is the reason for all our ills.  We stopped playing.
  6. Many are making a fuss over the San Diego couple who brought their infant and toddler daughters with them to sail across the sea, and then had to be rescued when things went wrong.  Forget about the bad parenting issues.  Why would you want to do such a thing?  It’s hard enough raising children on terra firma.
  7. Because we put a man on the moon, everything should be possible.  Recently, the phrase has come up often, particularly in the case of Malaysia Airlines Flight 370.  “We can put a man on the moon, but we can’t find a missing airplane?”  Let’s be honest.  Lunar exploration and then a rover on Mars is nearly unbelievable and so, yes, it seems unfathomable that we can’t achieve energy independence, coordinated school spring break schedules, hosiery that doesn’t run, printers that last longer than a month, and toothpaste that doesn’t gum up beneath the cap.
  8. Saw “Captain America” over the weekend because we generally have a good time with the Marvel movies.  There’s nothing really wrong with this Captain but I am now officially numb to the special effects and fight scenes.  It may have been my last comic-book-hero film for a while because nothing feels new and all of it feels like an assault on the senses.  Am I alone?  Do I sound old?
  9. Read this article from yesterday’s New York Times – “Life With a Dog: You Meet People” by Jane E. Brody – because, in addition to drinking plenty of water and getting some exercise, dogs will save your life.  I’ve mentioned that before and I’ll mention it again a thousand more times.
  10. There is currently no Number 10 item I wish to discuss but Tuesday’s alliteration required its inclusion.  I apologize.
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  1. says

    I hope you WILL give a full article to #5. Why have we stopped playing, and what is the solution? If we were in college, we’d get raging, stupid drunk on spring break (or Easter break depending on the college). And that would seem like playing until the next day. Anyway, I’d love to hear more on the topic of adults playing!!!

  2. Mary Pat says

    #3 made me giggle – I was picturing you in the swagger wagon with this conversation – wonderful!

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